Oxytocin in Labour and Birth | Guided By You Midwifery

Oxytocin is the love hormone of labour and birth.
Feel safe. Feel loved. Feel cared for. Let your oxytocin flow.

Oxytocin in Labour and Birth:

My Holistic Approach to Helping

You Feel Safe, Loved and Supported

Oxytocin is often called the love hormone, and it plays an incredibly important role in the physiology of birth.

But for me, supporting oxytocin isn't simply about understanding hormones.

It's about you.

It's about helping you feel safe, loved, cared for, listened to and important. It's about creating an environment where you feel that you are a priority and where you can let your body do what it needs to do.

Whether you're planning a home birth, hospital birth, VBAC, HBAC or caesarean birth, how you feel during your birth matters.

My holistic approach combines safe clinical midwifery care with an understanding of the physiology of birth, your emotional wellbeing and the importance of feeling secure and supported by the people around you.

What Is Oxytocin and Why Does It Matter in Birth?

Oxytocin is a hormone naturally produced by your body.

During labour, it plays an important role in stimulating uterine contractions and helping labour progress. After your baby is born, oxytocin continues to have important roles, including helping your uterus contract and supporting milk release during breastfeeding.

Oxytocin is also associated with bonding, connection and loving touch.

Birth isn't only a physical process. How you feel and the environment around you can influence your experience of labour.

That's why supporting the physiology of birth is about much more than simply watching contractions.

It's about looking after the whole of you.

My Holistic Approach Starts During Pregnancy

My holistic approach to your birth doesn't begin when you go into labour.

It starts during your antenatal care, with the time we spend getting to know one another and the continuity of care we build throughout your pregnancy.

By the time you give birth, I want to know you.

I want to understand what makes you feel safe, what helps you relax, what worries you and what makes you feel cared for.

When we do your birth planning, we'll also talk about my approach to your birth.

I'll explain how I work, how I support the natural physiology of birth and why I don't believe in unnecessarily disturbing you when your body is doing exactly what it needs to do.

But just as importantly, you can tell me what you're looking for from me.

You might want lots of reassurance.

You might want me to be your biggest cheerleader.

You might want a hand to hold, a cuddle or someone to talk to.

Or you might want peace, privacy and simply the reassurance of knowing that I'm there.

Getting to know these things during pregnancy helps me understand how you would like to be supported when labour begins.

There Is No Right Way to Labour

I've been privileged to attend hundreds of births, and one thing I've learnt is that there is no single way a woman labours.

I've seen women laugh through labour.

I've seen women cry.

Some want constant reassurance and encouragement, while others want complete peace and quiet and don't want anyone talking to them at all.

Some women want touch, closeness and comfort. Others don't want to be touched.

Some become incredibly quiet. Some are loud. Some get frustrated or angry.

Some want me close beside them, while others simply want to know I'm there if they need me.

And all of that is okay.

There is no right way to labour.

You don't need to behave in a certain way for me. You don't need to be calm, quiet or positive.

Labour is incredibly individual, and my role is to understand you, rather than expecting you to fit into somebody else's idea of what birth should look like.

And that's where antenatal preparation and continuity of care become so important.

During your pregnancy and birth planning, we'll talk about what you think you might need.

What makes you feel safe?

Do you like reassurance?

Do you want encouragement?

Do you love physical affection, or would you rather nobody touch you?

When you're overwhelmed, do you want somebody to talk things through with you, or do you need silence?

I like to get to know these things before you go into labour.

But I also know that sometimes you simply don't know what you're going to need until you're actually in labour.

And that's absolutely fine.

You might think you'll want lots of encouragement and then discover you don't want anyone to speak to you.

You might think you won't want to be touched and then find that holding someone's hand is exactly what you need.

Birth can bring out a completely different side of you.

That's where my experience comes in.

I'll watch you, listen to you and take my cues from you. I'll adapt my support as your labour unfolds because what you need at the beginning may be completely different from what you need a few hours later.

You don't have to know all the answers beforehand.

There is no right way to labour, but there is a right way to plan for labour, and that starts with getting to know you.

We can plan for your labour, but when the time comes, I'll meet you exactly where you are.

Feeling Safe, Loved and Cared For

Oxytocin is sometimes called the love hormone for good reason.

I want to help create an environment around you where you feel safe, secure, private, loved and cared for.

I want you to feel like you are my priority.

I want you to feel heard.

I want you to feel respected.

I want you to know that the person beside you understands what matters to you.

There can be warmth around you.

Calm voices.

Gentle reassurance.

Familiar faces.

Loving touch.

Encouragement.

Privacy.

Laughter if that's what you need.

Quiet if that's what you need.

You don't have to perform for me and you don't have to birth in a particular way.

You can simply be you.

Creating that feeling of safety, trust and connection is part of supporting an environment in which your body's natural oxytocin and the physiology of birth can be supported.

The Words I Use Matter

The language I use around you during birth is very important to me.

I am thoughtful about the words I choose and the way I communicate with you.

I want my voice to feel calm, reassuring and positive, particularly when you're feeling vulnerable or unsure.

That doesn't mean hiding information from you.

I will always be honest with you.

But information can be communicated calmly and thoughtfully, without unnecessarily filling your birth space with fear.

And when you need encouragement, I'll be your biggest cheerleader.

I'll remind you how well you're doing.

I'll encourage you when things feel difficult.

I'll help you find confidence in yourself when you need it most.

Because how you feel matters. How you're spoken to matters. How safe you feel matters.

That's all part of my holistic approach to birth.

Your Birth Partner Is Part of This Too

Your birth partner can have an incredibly important role in creating that feeling of safety, love and familiarity.

And part of my role is helping them feel confident supporting you too.

Partners can sometimes feel unsure during labour.

They desperately want to help, but they don't always know what to do.

I can gently guide them.

I might encourage them to rub your back, hold your hand, give you a cuddle or gently kiss you on the forehead.

I can help them understand when you need encouragement and when you simply need some quiet.

Those familiar voices, loving touches and moments of connection can help you feel safe, loved, protected and cared for, creating an environment that supports your body's natural oxytocin and the physiology of labour.

I'm not there to replace your partner.

I'm there to build their confidence too, so together we can give you the support you need.

Sometimes My Job Is Simply to Be There

My approach to birth isn't about constantly being in your space or feeling that I need to interfere with what your body is naturally doing.

Often, my role is simply to quietly observe.

I'll be there in the room with you, watching, listening and continually assessing you and your baby.

But I don't need to be in your face or interrupt the rhythm you've found.

If you're comfortable, coping well and your body is doing exactly what it needs to do, I'll let you be.

You might be leaning into your partner, moving instinctively, breathing, making noise, laughing, crying or completely absorbed in your own little birth bubble.

I don't want to unnecessarily disturb that.

I'm still your midwife.

I'm still observing.

I'm still assessing.

I'm still keeping the wellbeing of you and your baby at the heart of my care.

Sometimes just knowing that someone you know and trust is in the room with you is all you need from me at that moment.

And if you need me, I'm right there.

For me, holistic midwifery is also about knowing when not to interrupt the physiology of birth unnecessarily.

My presence is constant, but it doesn't need to be intrusive.

I trust the physiology of birth, I trust your body, and I'm there quietly watching over you while you do what your body needs to do.

Creating Your Birth Bubble

Your birth environment matters whether you're giving birth at home or in hospital.

Privacy, warmth, softer lighting, familiar voices, reassurance, loving touch if you want it, freedom to move and having people around you who make you feel safe can all contribute to the environment you birth in.

At a home birth, much of that familiarity is naturally around you.

In a hospital birth, we can still think about how to make the environment feel calmer and more personal to you.

Sometimes it's the smallest things that make the biggest difference.

The tone of someone's voice.

Your partner's hand.

A kiss on your forehead.

Someone telling you you're doing beautifully.

Knowing what's happening.

Feeling listened to.

Or simply being left in peace because that's exactly what you need.

Oxytocin Isn't Just About Home Birth

Supporting your emotional wellbeing and the physiology of birth isn't something that matters only if you're planning a home birth.

It matters during a hospital birth.

It matters during a VBAC.

It matters during an HBAC.

And feeling safe, reassured, informed, loved and cared for still matters if you're having a planned caesarean birth.

The clinical care may look different.

But you are still giving birth.

You are still the most important person in that experience.

And you still deserve to feel safe, respected, informed and supported.

What If Birth Changes Direction?

Holistic care and positive birth preparation doesn't mean pretending everything will always go according to plan.

Birth can be unpredictable.

Sometimes keeping you and your baby safe means that the plan needs to change.

And if it does, my approach to you doesn't change.

You still deserve calm communication.

You still deserve kindness.

You still deserve information.

You still deserve to understand what's happening.

You still deserve to be involved in decisions about your body and your baby.

And you still deserve someone beside you who knows you.

My role is to help you understand what's happening, support you through that change and help you continue to feel heard, cared for and involved in your care.

Holistic Midwifery Means Caring for the Whole of You

For me, holistic midwifery isn't separate from safe clinical midwifery care.

It's part of it.

Of course I'm looking at your physical wellbeing.

I'm assessing your baby.

I'm watching how your labour is progressing.

But I'm also looking at you.

Do you feel safe?

Do you feel comfortable?

Do you feel heard?

Do you feel cared for?

Do you feel like a priority?

Do you need information?

Do you need reassurance?

Do you need your biggest cheerleader?

Or do you simply need everyone to be quiet and give you space?

Your physical and emotional experiences of birth aren't completely separate.

That's why I protect your space.

It's why I'm thoughtful about the language I use.

It's why I'll help your partner feel confident supporting you.

It's why I'll hold your hand if that's what you need, sit quietly if you don't and be your biggest cheerleader when you need reminding of just how capable you are.

And it's why I spend so much time getting to know you during pregnancy.

By the time we reach your birth, you know me, I know you, and you know that you're my priority.

That's continuity of care.

That's holistic midwifery.

And that's the kind of environment I want to surround you with as you prepare to meet your baby.

Safe, Informed, Loved and Supported

I want you to have the birth of your dreams as much as you do.

But birth isn't something any midwife can promise or guarantee.

What I can promise is that my care will always be centred around you and your baby, supporting the birth you're hoping for while keeping your safety and wellbeing at the heart of everything I do.

My aim is for you to feel safe, informed, respected, loved, cared for and supported, whichever path your birth takes.

Sometimes the most powerful things I can bring into your birth space are knowledge, continuity, calmness and the reassurance of having someone you trust beside you.

Oxytocin After Your Baby Is Born

Oxytocin doesn't stop being important once your baby is in your arms. It continues to have an important role during the postnatal period, helping your uterus contract after birth and supporting the “let-down”, reflex when breastfeeding.

Those early moments of closeness matter too. Skin-to-skin, cuddles, loving touch and spending time getting to know your baby are all associated with the natural release of oxytocin.

For me, this is another reason why your care doesn't simply finish the moment your baby is born.

Protecting those precious first moments, helping you feel safe and cared for, and giving you time and space to meet your baby are all part of my holistic approach to postnatal care.

Get in Touch

Whether you're planning a home birth, hospital birth, VBAC, HBAC or caesarean birth, I would love to talk about how I can support you.

Get in touch and let's start preparing for your birth together.